Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Just Another What-the-What? Tuesday

I realize that I have been making too many lists lately. Too many. But I have had a few, "what the what?" moments this week so please forgive me.

1. The Ides of March. The Ides of March! Today, on the fifteenth day of March a buttload of years ago, good 'ole Caesar got the pulp juiced out of him via 33 stabs of death. Ouch. Sucks to be you.

2. Oh my goodies-not my goodies-there is a phenomenon sweeping Starbucks: CAKE POPS! What-the-what are cake-pops? Well, friends, Cake pops are little balls-o-cake on a stick. Because when a cupcake loves a loli-pop they play a little leap frog and nine months later...BAM: Cake-pops.

Starbucks has three flavors of the pops: Birthday Cake, Tiramisu, and Rocky Road. I have tried the  latter two and both of them are excellent. My favorite of course is the Rocky Road sans marshmallows.

There are also other miniature goodies featured at Starbucks this Spring. It's all part of their "Petite" line. So treats such as tiny ass Carrot cupcakes (my favorite!), peanut butter and chocolate cupcakes( These are awesome too!), and red velvet whoopie pies are available for a-munchin'.


3.Holy Zodiac, I'm a cusp!? That literally never occurred to me even though my birthday is the last day cut off for Capricorns. I always wondered why I never really matched up to a lot of the Capricorn's traits. I mean, yes I love challenges and can certainly push myself to do anything both physically and mentally, and yes I feel career driven. However, it's not as extreme and self-absorbed, and tight-waded as the Capricorn.

So it's only natural that when I looked over to the Aquarius traits last night, that I felt a strong sense of self and connectedness to many of them. For example, "Aquarians are the most mysterious and unusual people....people think their habits are eccentric and crazy" Also, the most likely to be insomniacs because of constantly thinking.(And as you know, Hank,I cannot sleep for my life and don't know what I would do without Ambien). Also, they have an intense drive to constantly be creative and original. Also, very loyal in friendships. This is crazy! 

Of course, statistically Aquarians make up the majority of the signs in mental institutions. Of course...

And so much more, so have a look for yourself: http://www.psychicguild.com/horoscopes_zodiac.php?sign=Aquarius

4. I got a notice from Country Living magazine along with the latest issue of the magazine in the mail yesterday. It was a late notice informing me that I owed $12.00. What-the-what!?
Since when do I get Country Living magazine? What am I, Paula Dean? I grew up in Southern California and currently live in New Jersey. Why-o-Why do the gods think they are so hilarious? Good one, guys. Real funny.

5. I had physical therapy today. While I  was lying on the table and getting my neck stretched out by the therapist, I noticed Kenny (a rehab technician) looking down my shirt as he was "walking" by. I should probably be upset, feel violated, or even be  offended but, I was more curious if he found anything down there...
My chest is like Where's Waldo: The Flatland Edition.  I think it's actually more densely populated in my pants (Thanks to the steroids from  a few weeks back).

6. Oh this point gets me all hot and bothered in a non-sexy way. ROAR. I am both seriously and surriously ticked off by this royal wanker, Glenn Beck. That's right, you know it's bad if the British colloquialisms are being unleashed.

Glenn Freaking Beck, thinks he's the prophet Isaiah preaching about the wrath of God. Yes, If you haven't already heard, Hank, Mr. Beck blames the current crisis in Japan on God's judgment for what happened with Pearl Harbor. He thinks the Tsunami/earthquake and all this nuclear power-plant disaster is God's way of saying, "F- you, Japs, Karma is a big-boned bitch."

Um, no. Not Okay, Mr. High-and-Mighty Duck. I am so sick of these hyper-conservative-Fox News-supporting-radical weirdos likening disasters to the Old Testament's, "Theology of Retribution". It was the theory that people were sick and/or poor because they were bad.

Remember a few years back, when one of Beck's friends, Jerry Falwell (Founder of Liberty University) claimed 9/11 was God punishing the United States for homosexuality and feminism?

This is not retribution. This is a freak natural happenstance because the earth is old. And as fragile as the rest of us. Plate tectonics happen. They always have since their beginning. Crusts shift. And if we are going to be "BIBLICAL" in our opinions then let's draw from Genesis when God promised he wasn't going to flood the world again. Remember Noah? He had that ark and the animals  walked in two-by-two...And now we have rainbows as the sign that it won't happen again, right? That is biblical...

Thousands of people died in Japan. What kind of a God would be so angry that he would act as an executioner to innocent people (most of which weren't even alive during Pearl Harbor)? Just because someone is omniscient and all powerful, just because someone has the ability to wipe everyone from the earth, doesn't mean he or she will do it. God has nothing to prove.

 I think you are confusing the Bible with Greek Mythology, sir.Because that sounds more like Poseidon and not the loving, forgiving Lord Christianity is based on. Again, that's if we're going to get biblical here.

7. Sigh...I had better do another point so this post doesn't end on such a depressing note like a b flat.

The other day I was sorting through a couple of boxes in my closet and I found one of my old cameras. What-the-what?!  I didn't know there were any survivors of my once extensive camera collection. I am all kinds of excited, folks. I used to collect mostly vintage 8 mm and even 16 mm movie cameras when I was younger. The collection somehow "disappeared" during our move from California to New Jersey, and needless to say, I was very sad about this.

Honestly, they are not worth all that much monetarily. The binder I have filled with original, mint-condition Power Ranger cards are probably worth more. But they have such a nostalgic and sentimental value for me.

My grandfather got me hooked on gadgets--vintage binoculars, and cars, and cameras etcertera-- before he died. I was only five, so those are all the memories I get. But some of them are so vivid. And this found camera made me want to cry in a good way.
Of course I didn't though...

A Super 8mm Canon Canosound 514XL-S.  Unfortunately, it's not as old as the other camera's I had. This is only a late 60's-early 70's camera. But it has a pistol grip and that's badass.

Well that appears to be all the What-the-What!? epilipetic spasams that I can have for one Tuesday. So perhaps I will continue to add more favorite things throughout the week or maybe I will write about something that does not involve lists. We can only hope. Thanks for secretly reading my blog late at night in your bedrooms like it's HBO soft porn and you don't want your parents to hear the moans. I mean....wait.

Over and Out: KSHH
-Michelle J

1 comment:

  1. When I was a kid I lived in Utah, and the Boy Scouts was taken over by Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (FLDS Church). This, so called religion, practices underage polygamy, they send the boy s off on missions to divide the underage sisters umong the dirty old men of the clan. Now when these underage girls get pregnant, these same dirty old men, send them to the state to get their welfare checks . You should see some of the palace homes that are paid with welfare checks. By the way this is the newest religion that was created right here in United States of America, I guess their also in AZ, NM, TX, NV, CO, OK. Someone should ask Glenn Beck about it, he seems to have all the answers.