Thursday, March 17, 2011

Hey, How Did My Patty-Cakes Get Crabs?

Happy Patty-Cakes, kiddies.

The worst part of any holiday, other than being around extended family, are the cards, whether Hallmark or any other brand, no matter what holiday.

The cards are all lame. They literally make lepers seem more fun. This is why we should always make our own cards. Let the people choose, amen?

I mean instead of: "Happy Saint Patrick's Day.Cheers."

why not,

"Happy drink til you wretch because your life sucks day!"


" Happy Salvation Day, you Irish Catholics. Partake in this communion and then get back on the boat!"


" It's Saint Patrick's Day; He can cry if he wants to."

Let's just start being honest in our greeting card messages, Hallmark and Carlton and all you other leprechauns. Capishh? We will continue discussing this greeting card business some other time.

Today at physical therapy, my therapist was telling me that his 18 month year old daughter likes to take her pants off at daycare. I was so inspired ...when I got home I did the same.

We all have our own way of celebrating this Irish holiday.Just try not to have sex with any green people. Or any green cantaloupes (Because they're probably not ripe).

Be safe tonight, weirdos.

Over and out:kshh
-Michelle J

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