Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Bloopers and Extras -The Unemployment Diaries

Happy Tuesday, from your PP friends! (Also, from your friends at Poo Pies)

We have put together a few bloopers and extras from the Unemployment Diaries for your visceral entertainment. Or you know, for your Nana to enjoy during her usual quasi-open bar, night-cap.

So show Nana some love and roll those stockings down to your ankles, assuage the sting of hemorrhoid-itis with a circular, inflatable pillow, and crack open an ice cold blooper reel.

Also, Here is an exclusive , but very short, glimpse of behind the scenes at TUD:

Thanks for watching!

Over and Out:kshh
-Michelle J

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The Unemployment Diaries--Episode 5

Howdy Doody, it's Tuesday. And a numbingly cold Tuesday if you live in, on, around, above, below, or  beyond the East Coast and it's icy wind-chill.  Burr, Aaron--it's seriously frigid out--and I mean that in the non-sexually inept kind of way.

So hear is the deal: I will post this exclusive installment of The Unemployment Diaries fifth episode, "Un, Deux, Trios...Nerf!", if you agree to watch it and pass it along if you like it. Think of this video as a very hot potato, and you, the person that doesn't want herm's hand scorched so he/she passes it along to someone else who could better use some third degree hand burns. Or so the sentiment goes something along those lines...right.

We hope you enjoy this little starchy snack we've cooked up with our easy bake ovens, and lava lamp. (Lava lamp, heat lamp, they're all the same...)

Thank you again for watching and for spreading the word that is Poo-Pies.com and the willy-wonky web series that is TUD!

Think of yourselves as the Jehovah's Witnesses of comedy. Except we don't demand servitude at the threat of your impending  salvation. We just threaten to disembowel you with some snarky, sharp farts that will implode your souls if you don't pass them along to someone else  (Or whatever that empty thing is deep, down in the catacombs of your rectum).

This video is shot in HD so don't forget to change the setting to either 720p HD or 1080p HD. It's that switch on the bottom right side of the Youtube screen by the "full screen button". This will greatly improve your HD resolution experience.

Roger that, Rabbit?

Over and Out: kshh
-Michelle J

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

The Unemployment Diaries -Episode 4

HO HO HO, OH OH OH, Why is this Zombie eating my toe (better there than on my face...book) ? AM I right? 

So we would like to apologize for being like the guy that doesn't call after you finally have intercourse in his parent's Buick.  We were trying to re-group last week so we could film the Christmas episode and get a head start on some more episodes.

 It's not easy being such a small crew, with so many limitations. But we are trying. We realize that even if there are only two people who are excited about this show every week, it's totally worth it. So please forgive us for our absence last week.  We hope you enjoy this bizarre, but quirky, charming, but  not really charming little episode we have concocted.

Special thanks to Bryant Vance for being born mostly, but also for giving us the gift of our very own theme song! It's the most fantastic thing to get stuck in your head. I mean, next to The Blood Hound Gang's song, The Bad Touch of course. 

Everyone at Poo Pies (both of us) wish you a very, berry Christmas (even if they are not in season).  Try to enjoy this time with your families. And be kind to each other. And have a little faith people. And the threat of a zombie Apocalypse.

Until then, please enjoy this  Bad Touch/ Christmas song mash-up on us!

Sing us out, boys:

And a one, and a two, and a ...You and me baby ain't nothing but jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the love the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket, oh what fun it is to ride please turn me on I'm  Mr. Coffe with an automatic drip, so show me yours I'll show you mine in a one horse open sleighhhhhhh. etc...

Over and Out:kshh
-Michelle J

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

The Unemployment Diaries -Episode 3

The third Episode is up ( like your bf's... toilet seat) !

 Check it out. Ask it out. Pay for dinner.

Thank you for watching! And remember these videos make great stocking stuffers for friends and family. Especially if their stockings are computers, smart phones, ipads, or smart televisions.

Over and Out: kshh
-Michelle J

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Episode 2- The Unemployment Diaries

Originally, we made such an epically long pilot episode, we had to split it into two shows. So all the following episodes should be substantially shorter than the first two. Which is fine, because we all know the universal motto "Shorter is better". Or, wait...

If you like it, please share it. If people can preach scream about fire and damnation from street-corners like they're hookers with tourettes(or they just had a really bad burrito), then sharing this video webily  through social media outlets should be a cake. A real piece.

Here is part 2 of Last week's episode, "Jobs Jobs Jobs, Steve":

Over and Out: kshh
-Michelle J

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

The Unemployment Diaries --Pilot Episode

Can someone give me a hoo-ha? This episode is finished and as out as Adam Lambert, and his boyfriend, and his boyfriend (That's a lot of friendly boys).

I hope you enjoy it as much as we did when we first watched it weeks ago. And by now, we've had all the noodle references we can handle. Post traumatic stress disorder really has no boundaries, as we have found via a case of the jumpity-jump-jumps and spasms shakes, with the mere mention of anything al dente.

If you like this video, don't be bashful. We've seen you naked through the clear-glass shower door (don't think your angled posture was fooling anybody), so feel free to share this with the world [wide web]. And your mom. And the mail man (who you just so happen to resemble. a lot).

Over and Out:kshh
-Michelle J

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Let's Eat Some Low-Fat Snookies. That Wasn't a Lesbian Reference.

Do you ever have those moments where you laugh out loud at something, slap your knees (akin to how you could still slap your child in the nineties), and choke on your over-cooked quiche--all at once? I call that Tuesday.

And this past Monday's edition of the New York Post printed a short article about Snooki's recent weight loss. The article suggested that now she is a "low-fat meatball". And I lost it.
Much like she lost her v-card in the ball-pit at her thirteenth birthday party:

It even inspired me to make my own meatballs tonight: 48 Snookies in all.

Gotta love those meatball metaphors.

Over and Out:kshh
-Michelle J

Now if they had only included a low-fat snooki recipe...Yes, it would have been over the top (of a cliff) Thelma and Louise style, but I would have thoroughly enjoyed dissecting it.
With my tongue. (What, I still need to appeal to  my lesbian audience:Hank.)

Monday, November 14, 2011

Promo--The Unemployment Diaries

Hey remember when I was being sketchy and vague about a "project" I was working on in the name of the poo and the pies? I finally have proof that I haven't been prostituting my pillow-pets to fetish groups and slaughterhouses.

Here's the promo to my new sit-down comedy, "The Unemployment Diaries". It's a Poo Pies Original web series. We figured we would start out small and eventually we will work our way up to the classier comedies/web series-sitcoms with legit actors and a bigger crew. And by "we", I mean me and the voices in my head.

If you like this promo--share it, tweet it, blog it, fb it, bop it--whatever you are into. And if you don't like it, that's okay too. I mean...nobody's perfect, right?

Over and Out: kshh
-Michelle J

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Screw Good Music, I Just Want to Dance Like a Drunk Princess in Heat!

Remember when Coldplay was a legit band and you weren't embarrassed to say that you listen to their music?  Yeah, me neither. But I have to admit they sounded/presented themselves with a little more dignity in the past. And I was a bit of a fan during their, "Yellow" days.

Last night Coldplay dazzled bedazzled the SNL stage with two songs from their latest album, Mylo Xyloto. The second song they performed, "Every Teardrop is a Waterfall", Chris Martin danced around the stage like Tinkerbell with one of her wings slashed off. I spent a couple of eye-brow furrowed minutes wondering if I was witnessing an awkward tween sexual awakening, or if he was in fact having a stroke on live television.

I guess we know who will not be asked to join next season's, Dancing with the Stars, cast:

If you think this is worse than aborting a hotpocket via your bowels, you owe me a round of high fives. Until then...

Over and Out:kshh
-Michelle J